Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Spring Training!

So it's less than a week until the first preseason games, and the excitement is palpable. At least, it is in my half of the apartment. By which I mean I'm really excited. Noteworthy items this week:
  • Roger Clemens to work out with Astros' minor leaguers after promising not to throw at his son's head
  • Miguel Cabrera now 15 pounds lighter, still pretty fat
  • Hanley Ramirez adorable and media-friendly; will likely be out for the season after attempt to metaphorically saw off his leg to escape the contract that has him chained to Pro Player Stadium until 2012 results in real, non-metaphorical injury
  • Fans, baseball writers once again expressing excitement over Rickie Weeks even though any fantasy owner can tell you he did them NO FUCKING GOOD last year
  • Mark DeRosa suffering from irregular heartbeat brought on from entire season of waking up in the middle of the night to see Lou Piniella standing over his bed and breathing heavily
  • Cardinals still desperately searching to round out their starting rotation; Rick Ankiel (xoxo) backing quietly out of the room whenever the discussion comes up
  • Kosuke Fukudome still a source of hope, filthy jokes for Cubs fans
  • Nomar Garciaparra claims this is his "comeback year" for fourth year in a row as Dodgers fans remain jaded, emotionally numb
  • Red Sox sign Bartolo Colon to minor league deal; McCoy Stadium in Pawtucket to add small grazing pasture behind right field wall

Also: do the Clippers have those weird jugglers at EVERY halftime?

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